The One With The Many Failed Ones

And so it wasn’t much of a rebirth after all. And that was 2 years ago.

I should be banished from the blog kingdom, really. But in my attempts to start with blogging again, I realized how many ‘drafts’ I’ve kept all along these 2 years. Many of those drafts could be traced in smaller and compact forms via Facebook status updates (mostly rants) and Twitter updates.

So no I’ve not given up on blogging, but it got dissected down to smaller bits and chunks, much like how blogs began as a separation and informal tool to produce texts on a social computing scale on the Web.

So, what’s the purpose of this blog of mine here? I highly doubt anybody will ever come across this blog of mine, in fact, let me put it correctly, I am almost certain that no one will ever read this. But I’d like to believe that there is still one small purpose this blog can do.

I got inspired by you Joshua Chay to start writing again after watching your ‘5-years-from-now’ video thing (if however, there are people who HAPPENED to read this and wondering what the video is all about, it’s basically a recorded video of yourself so that you can view it 5 years from now, kinda like a time capsule thing).

So yes, this blog will serve a new purpose to me: to serve as a time machine. But with no time specified viewing time.

Digging up all my old blog posts really did a number on me. I was a horrible writer. And I write about the most pathetic and annoying things ever. Why on earth would people read all that junk last time???

So of course, naturally, I will tell myself this. PLEASE, for the love of Harry, DO NOT WRITE NONSENSE. Like, UTTER NONSENSE.

I wish that time traveling actually exists and works.

I would have told myself that everything would be fine 3 years ago, when I didn’t knew what my life’s direction was.

I would have told myself that in spite of Dad’s stroke and the seemingly impossible task to appease him or help him to recover, that everything is indeed better than it was so that I would not have lost so much sleep to it.

I also would have told myself to not look down on myself that often 5 years ago, for I am with the love of my life (the female one, not the guitar[s]) and that I will graduate with a first class honours degree and head on to pursue a Masters course in UK in year 2011.

And I wish I can tell myself in the present time via a future me, that:

“Yeap. Everything will be fine as well.”

But instead, I would like to end this post here with this message for the future me.

“Hey, me of the future. Are you somebody else you don’t want to be yet? Good, you’re on track in life. Until the next time.”

Next time it is.

The One With The Ending One

I guess things finally caught up in life. Things weren’t as carefree as it used to be. I’m twice as busy as I was a year ago, and though I hate being all caught up and stuff, I’m getting used to it and all. 2009 sums a pretty bad year for me already (and it’s not even end of the year yet!). Family, relationships, finances, education, spirituality well-being… I guess this is the year where it went downhill all the way. I secretly hope all these things would come to an end.

To all faithful and avid readers of this pathetic blog, thanks for the ride. I’m shutting this place down for good. It’ll be like… a toy collection, except it is not a toy collection. But I’m sure you know what I mean. Once in awhile you will clean up your storeroom or attic and you will find a Batman or a Barbie Doll toy figure that would just instantly spark the child within you.

I am more active in Twitter and Facebook these days. Follow me in Twitter at LINK, and add me in Facebook at LINK.

Thanks guys and girls. Happiness is not a destination. God bless.

The One With The Feel Good Factor

Why do we self indulge in certain things in life? Now, indulging yourself into things doesn’t necessary mean it is a bad thing. It could do you good; a form of escapism in a sense. But it is when you over indulge, that is when things start to turn ugly. Am I right, celebrities from Hollywood?

The many controls of life? I’m sure we would sometimes imagine our life to be in this tweakable buttons form, so that we can tweak it to the max.

Heck, who am I kidding, everyone is into something, or rather over indulging themselves into something in one form or another because of exactly what it does, it gives that thrill. That excitement. That joy. That feel good factor about it.

In other words, the feel good factor is being addicted. Feel good factor or over indulging are just nicer terms for addiction.

Of course, there are so many kinds of addiction going on around the world. Right from the basic ones like addicted to food and cleanliness, to the not so basic ones like smoking and drinking. But there is one form of addiction that is quite the neither here nor there category; it simply could not be categorized if ever there is such a scale to measure addictiveness.

Oh yeah, Gordon Ramsay’s feel good factor is when he takes away other people’s feel good factor…

It is the addiction to fame.

And it scares me that a whole lot of people are not knowing or aware of this. I mean, if you’re doing something that you know is completely unnecessary or perhaps could be deemed as the wrong things to do, you might as well be objective about it and go for the whole 9 yards of it. But to some, they don’t even know why they are doing so.

I have a friend who completely sold herself to becoming close to be branded as a semi-pornstar model status. Another acquaintance of mine fell for the whole multi level marketing scheme thing, and has been pestering his group of friends (me included) to join in his so-called multi million dollar business. And not forgetting to mention another friend of mine who is into the whole Kenny Sia blogging fame now. But I find that to be way more acceptable than the others though.

Thing is, we aren’t sure of what we want anymore. Not sure of why we spent excessive money on getting a 300 bucks hair cut. Not sure on why we spent thousands of ringgit just to manage our hair. Spend few hundred bucks on getting a pair of sunglasses. Getting stuff from IKEA where you clearly know you cannot afford to spend that kind of money buying things that other stores could rip off at quarter of the price at IKEA. All of these so called indulgences leads back down the pipeline on one single thing only at the end of the day, and that is… fame.

Yes, perhaps things like addiction to smoking and stuff shouldn’t be considered as doing it for the fame. But think again, the very first puff you took in your entire life. Why do you even bother to start smoking? Pressure or stress from work? Or… peer pressure from your friends that if you don’t smoke you don’t fit in? Oh, take blogging for instance too. Why do we even bother to blog? Cuz of the convenience of having an electronic diary for you to jot down all your memories, to improve your writing skills so that you can write better next time? Or… the temptation of being of being famous through your blog, in the hopes that it would be a celebrity blog like Kenny Sia or Xia Xue? Think again.

It is of course no harm to go the extra mile for the fame and the so called feel good factor, from doing certain things. I am not writing in the manner to condemn nor am I being sarcastic and say that people who aim to be famous one day are losers. Go ahead, be as famous as you want to be in your own right. I think everyone needs to have this feel good factor in their life.

*James Brown’s I Feel Good playing in the background*

The One With ZOMG

ZOMG!!!! ( Z-Oh My Gosh, don’t ask me why the Z is placed in front of the word ‘Oh’, its just way it is)

This site is so dead. The last time I checked, dinosaurs were roaming in this place.

…okay so I got lamer by the day.

Anyways, as most of you would know (a LOT of people STILL thinks I’m in TAR College, which no offense, UCSI is muchhhhh better), I’m in my final academic year for my degree in Mass Communication in UCSI. This semester proves to be a huge mountain that I need to overcome, as I told myself earlier on this semester. The reason of it is that this semester is hands down the BUSIEST and CRAZIEST semester I’ll ever be in.

First of you got UniFest, an event which I took part in as the co-organizer. Took us 4 months to plan for it, so which means the planning and stuff took place last year September, all the way until this year January. The end result was of course fantastic, turn out was superb and it definitely thought not only me but the entire crew to learn something new through this event.

In the mean time, I’ve got the Redeemed Easter Rally by UCSI Christian Fellowship, where I was the organizing chairperson. Planning started 6 months back, from around the same time as UniFest until the event day which was at 31st March 2009. In many ways, this event turned out to be a success rather than a failure.

This dude here is Mr Terry Yeow Tau Han, the guy pivotal and crucial for a lot of UCSI things. But sad to say, he is leaving us very soon. And why is he leaving? It’s cuz of money, that’s why! Look at the 50 ringgit note he is displaying at the picture. “They are paying me 50 bucks more to work for them” he said. Terrible fella… but sigh, we will miss him badly around campus.

Let’s talk academic shall we. I took one pathway subject, one year 2 subject, and three year 1 subjects. A total of 5 subjects for the semester, and it ain’t EASY.

On top of that, I have a relationship to handle. It’s not a burden, but as all of us with girlfriend or boyfriend could testify as well, that having a relationship indeed eats up a lot of your time.

So yeah, the ZOMG proclaimation is for this semester’s hecticness and craziness.

BUT… I’m glad to say that it is finally over. Close to being over to be precise, I have one more test and one more assignment before bidding adieu to this semester.

What can I look for in the coming semester? Well… as of now, I know I’ll be taking three year 3 subjects, one year 2 subject and one year 1 subject. After the next semester, I’ve only 3 more subjects to clear, and then I’m free from the clutches of UCSI!!!

In the events side, I will be taking over the reigns for The Hive next semester onwards (until I find a suitable candidate to take over I guess?). I was told by my school’s head that they are interested in getting me and my emcee partner for last year’s Awards Day to be the emcee’s for the Orientation Day in July. Apart from that, I will be hosting UCSI Got Talent as well, with Lydia Kwan as my partner this coming May and June. Apart from that, the CF approached me to be involved in the committee for the coming semesters. I said yes to it because for me God’s works should always be number 1 in our lives.

But as crazy as it may sound, it’s comforting to know that at least I am busy in my life. Being busy and all is a good sign that God is working and moving you around, well, for me it is at least. Here’s to another ZOMG to next semester.

The One With Redeemed Rally 09

Yes folks. I know, this page has not been regularly updated. My bad, too busy with things and stuff.

Oh well… just wanna do a quick post here on REDEEMED Rally 2009.

Yes! The second Easter rally from UCSI CF! It’s happening this 31st March 2009, Tuesday 7pm onwards. Do come and enjoy our performances, dances, music presentations, dramas and so much more!

Visit redeemed09.blogspot.com for more info.

The One Where Marcus Is Gone

It’s only been how long since you’re gone huh?
Two weeks or so?

But darn…

At the risk of sounding gay, but dude, miss you darn a lot man.

Miss the WoW moments, the yam chas and all. And especially the times we worked on music related stuff. Thank you so much for playing for our final gig together before you went off. Meant a lot to me.

Sigh dude… come back la… Aussie is no fun.

The One With The Valentine’s

It’s not the question of whether you’re succumbing into being a society slave by celebrating Valentine’s Day these days…

It’s really whether you love that person so much that you’re willing to be labeled a society slave by treating her dinner, buying her flowers and stuff.

I know I do. Love you.

The One With The Two Three

Just a random thought came to my head whilst reading the darlin’s blog…

Am I getting too old? I mean… 23 this year? And still doing my degree? Most people at this age would be already working or graduating with their degree soon.

Am I really late in my life? The darlin will be getting her degree by 21. And I’m still here doing mine.

Sometimes… just sometimes… I wish I won’t be getting any older than I am.

Somebody said:

A prodigy is someone with exceptional talent before the age of 10.
Above 15, you’re talented.
Above 20 however, you’re a normal person. A nobody.

I guess I’m 3 years late then…
*babe… at least you still have 1 year to be considered ‘talented’. And you get your degree by 21. Unfair.

The One Where Obama Wins

“Will the new president of the United States please stand up?”

Congrats Obama. I feel a wind of change already…

The One With The Turn Off…

Was waiting for the mum to finish her banking stuff during lunch yesterday…

And a Fitness First salesperson came to try and promote their latest promotions and bla bla bla…

Was very interesting. For a small fee I get to get 1 month membership and bring one person to the gym anytime during their operating hours. And I get to choose a free gift too along the process… until he said…

Salesperson: “Sir, are you drive?”

Me: o_0 (that was my face’s expression to that question)

Me: Wh…What?

Salesperson: “Are you drive?”

Me: … …

What a turn down. What a let off. I think he meant do I drive or something. Sigh… there goes my keeping fit plan…